Divorce and Remarriage 2

00:02 I want to greet you this morning in the name of Jesus, and we want to continue this morning. This will be the final message on our subject of marriage, divorce, and remarriage. There are more aspects to this subject that could be looked at, but we did that some time ago when I was preaching through the book of Malachi. 00:23 And Malachi chapter 2 has some very important things to say about marriage and divorce and remarriage, but we're not going there this time. But what I'd rather do today is look at some of the... it's kind of... kind of wrap up this subject that's been before us and give some answers to some of the questions that are raised. 00:45 Some of them have been raised by you in my other messages, and others are just questions that they do come up. They come up whenever this subject is addressed, and it is certainly addressed in our culture. We are living in the days, as was true in the days of Noah, 01:07 where men and women were marrying and given in marriage. And there's a number of ways of looking at that passage. 01:13 I believe it can refer to rampant divorce and remarriage, putting away wives and getting other wives, and covenant breakers, as well as implying that life was going on as normal in the days before the flood came. 01:32 But those days were perverted and sinful, breaking of covenants and full of violence. The earth was full of violence. And so when we come to marriage this morning, it is a precious subject. It's also a difficult subject. One writer said this. 01:50 He said, "Marriage ceremonies have always been a problem for me." This was a pastor. "They've always been a problem for me. I have joked that I would rather have a funeral any day than a marriage." Now, I shouldn't say this this morning with Naomi's upcoming wedding. That will be accepted from this, I'm sure. 02:11 But the people are always more sincere at funerals, and you never have to question whether the person is ready to be buried. You do have to question whether some people are ready to be married, and the results are definitely permanent. And so when you have a funeral, that's it. 02:31 It's permanent. It's the way it is. And it should be that way when it comes to marriage as well. When you have a wedding, it's permanent. That's the way it is. That's the way it is. It doesn't change. You don't enter into some other exchange. So we want to deal with some questions this morning. 02:50 But before we do, we want to just do a little bit of review. We have in these messages covered the universal marriage law, which is the original intent of marriage back in the Garden of Eden. 03:05 Jesus said, "From that time it was such." And that "from that time" is not "at that time," but "from that time," meaning a continuous action, that that has been God's standard. 03:19 The original intent was one flesh relationship joined by God and separated only by Him through death. Now, there were some allowances made in the Old Testament. 03:32 Those should not be looked at as the standard for the church age because Jesus reinstituted the original marriage law. We also have said that it is equally valid upon the sons of Adam, both believers and non-believers. We'll look at that a little bit later this morning as well. 03:54 We looked at the exception clause. We looked at Romans 7, and we looked at 1 Corinthians 7 briefly. We then established the clear scriptures, the clear passages of scriptures. 04:08 Then we looked at some of the unclear passages, specifically the exception clause in Matthew chapter 5 and Matthew chapter 19. 04:17 That exception clause, we believe, covers the betrothal period where it was a legally binding relationship going into engagement. And if that were to be broken or to find impurity in either him or her, mostly her, 04:37 because that was the way it could be proven that she had been impure, then that was grounds for termination of that contract and then putting her away and marrying another. So it does have to do with the betrothal period. 04:51 It's recorded only in the book of Matthew, and it also defends Joseph in his being a just man and being willing to put her away privately. Well, how could you do that, Joseph, if you were legally bound to her and in a covenant with her? Well, you could do that according to the exception clause in Matthew 19 and Matthew 5. 05:13 And they also said it has the choice of words. We looked at the choice of words there about adultery, fornication, and sexual sins. We've covered that. And also, if you want to look at Matthew 19:9 this morning, there is another aspect of looking at that that should be considered. Matthew 19:9, 05:34 "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife except for fornication or sexual immorality and marries another, commits adultery." Now, some people want to take that phrase and put it at the end of the phrase. 05:51 If anyone puts his wife away or is except for sexual immorality, and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery, they want to put that exception clause at the end of that rather than after the phrase that says, 06:08 "Whoever divorces his wife," not... and that the statement there, "except for sexual immorality," refers to the legitimacy of the divorce and not of the remarriage. So that is another way of looking at that passage of scripture. 06:28 So we looked at some of that. We've also looked then in the second message on the position of the early church and the early church fathers, the early church writers. How did the early church pastors and bishops and deacons look at the teachings of Christ in the first several centuries? 06:46 And maybe we can even say that how did they look at it through the first 1,500 years of church history? And we looked at a number of statements that go with that. 07:01 And okay, one of which was being marriage is a lifelong commitment that will never be invalidated by God while both parties live. That was the belief of Hermes, Justin Martyr, Clement, Origen, Basil, Ambrose, and Augustine. Another one was by Augustine. His statement was, "It never has been lawful, 07:21 is not now lawful, and never will be lawful to divorce and remarry. To say and do otherwise is to worship and adopt the adulterous superstitions of a different God than the one to which we have to do." That's pretty clear. 07:40 That's pretty clear in around 400 BC or AD. And so that was pretty much the standard belief through the church age until about 1500. Now, we looked at the patristic view or the early fathers' view. 07:54 This view declared if one were to suffer the misfortune of divorce, remarriage to a second spouse was not permitted regardless of the cause. Also then the Augustinian view that Jesus remarks in Matthew 19 to be refusing to take adultery as a cause for separation, divorce, or nullity, annulment. 08:15 Remarriage is always wrong following a valid marriage. And then the betrothal or engagement view. We've looked at that. And then also the unlawful marriage view. This view said divorce would be allowed only in the case of a forbidden incestuous marriage, such as when close relatives married. 08:35 Apart from this particular circumstances, neither divorce nor remarriage to a second spouse would be permitted. And Ryri and Steele, in case you were not here in the other messages, I do think this is noteworthy. 08:48 Two Bible scholars said that careful research through the hundreds of manuscripts written by church leaders of the first five centuries has revealed that with only one exception, the church fathers were unanimous in their understanding that Christ and Paul taught, "If one were to suffer the misfortune of divorce, 09:09 remarriage was not permitted regardless of the cause." These were the only doctrinal conclusions the early church knew and continued to know for over 1,500 years concerning the permanence of the marriage covenant. Now, the question is, and some of you have asked us, how did we get from there to here to where we are today? 09:31 How did we get from there to here? There is a fifth historical view, but this historical view doesn't go back to the first century. This goes back to the 16th century with a man by the name of Erasmus. Erasmus is called Erasmus the Rascal. Some have paraphrased him. 09:48 And he was the first humanist coming out of the Middle Ages, the medieval period. And as a humanist, he emphasized the individual. The individual and the ultimate goal was the education, the welfare, and the happiness of the individual. Now, 10:08 if you know anything about what was happening at this time, this was a time of great upheaval, and the Reformation was underway. And Luther was a contemporary of Erasmus and was influenced by Erasmus, as well as the Anabaptists were being influenced or not starting until about 1525, 10:29 but working under Ulrich Zwingli in Switzerland. And back in England, you had a man by the name of Henry VIII who was king. And King Henry VIII was a scoundrel also, a rascal. 10:48 And he had married a woman by the name of Catherine of Aragon. And she fell out of favor with him. And Henry wanted out of the marriage. He was in love with Anne Boleyn. And then he fell out of favor with her and had about six wives until it was all said and done. 11:09 But Catherine was his first wife. He wanted to, but he was under the thumb of the Pope. And the Pope would not grant him, for political reasons and for scriptural reasons, would not grant him an annulment or divorce so he could remarry. And all Henry was asking for was an annulment. 11:26 Just negate that first marriage and then let me be free to marry who I want. 11:32 And so Erasmus, whose head was on the block because he was charged to justify this, him and the Archbishop of Canterbury, a man by the name of Thomas Cranmer, were charged to find a way to justify Henry VIII's divorce and remarriage. 11:53 And so basically, Erasmus, as a humanist, believed that human happiness is the ultimate ideal. And he used to justify the divorce and remarriage of Henry VIII in England. He was used by his ideas were used to justify that remarriage. And the innocent party, 12:12 his idea was this: that the innocent party is allowed to divorce and remarry in the case of adultery, desertion, or any moral uncleanness. Now, this was a departure from 1,500 years of Christian history. 12:32 And Erasmus is trying to come up with a way that Henry VIII could be justified by the church to divorce and remarry. By the way, we know that ultimately that led Henry VIII to break with the Catholic Church and to establish the Church of England or the Anglican Church, which in America is called the Episcopal Church. 12:52 And he did that and setting himself up as the defender of the faith. And of course, there's a lot of political stuff happening during that time to make this all happen. 13:04 And Erasmus was the one who opened the door through this exception clause and the innocent party idea to justify Henry's divorce and remarriage. Luther used some of this reasoning. He was influenced by Erasmus. 13:24 And Luther said this: that the common people are not able to live according to the high demands of the gospel. That was Luther's belief. That was one of the ways that he separated the saints from the super saints from the lesser saints. He said, "You poor people down here, 13:44 you can't even begin to live according to the high demands of the gospel. And so we're going to make it possible for you to live in peace and love and get by to heaven somehow." And so he used an Old Testament justification for remarriage. 14:05 Now, Luther's thinking went like this: that in the Old Testament, if someone committed adultery, he was what? He was stoned. So as a result of that stoning, he was dead. A death had happened. And so in the New Testament, 14:27 under the grace of God and under the new covenant, we don't stone adulterers anymore. But in God's eyes, they are as good as dead. You see how convenient that is? Because Romans 7 says, "If any woman marries another man while her husband is living, 14:48 she commits adultery. But if she marries someone after her husband dies, she doesn't commit adultery even though she's married to another man." So if he's dead in God's eyes, ah, there you have it. Now, until I understood this, I could never understand what some people say. 15:06 And I've heard about family members that have had this said to them by ministers. Well, you promised to be faithful to each other as long as you both shall live or until death. 15:24 What happened in your previous marriage is that your love died. And so because your love died, there has been a death, and you're now free. Now, is that convoluted or what? 15:37 But what he was doing was taking Luther to the logical end and just rearranging that theological chapter a little bit. And so this idea was then pretty much adopted by the reformers. And you see it today gone to seed. 15:59 In fact, one Christian writer, a man by the name of Lovett, I read a review of his book. So I have not read the book. 16:08 But if the review is accurate, which I believe it is based on the reviewer that I know, said basically this: that it is not good for God's reputation for people to be unhappy and bitter and angry. 16:24 And so therefore, we make God look better and look good when our needs are well met and we are satisfied and happy. So therefore, go ahead and divorce and remarriage because that's good advertising for God. No mention about whether it's holy or not. 16:43 But that's the church world that we're living in today, brothers and sisters. And we don't have to look very far. That is standard Protestant evangelical theology. 16:58 And it has no basis in history or in proper hermeneutical interpretation of the scriptures. Now, some of the other questions I want to address this morning will get a little bit controversial. 17:15 Because what happens is, and this is the danger that we have, is while I'm preaching this morning, 17:23 you will be thinking about this person or that person or this family member or that family member or this friend or this well-meaning Christian person who's divorced and remarried and will have all these thoughts. 17:44 Well, what about this? And what about him? And what about her? And what about my family member? What about my children? What about my loved ones? What about my parents? What about my siblings? I would just urge us not to do that while we're teaching. And then afterwards, you can go there. 18:01 But try to approach this with an open mind rather than with a situation in mind that you're trying to maneuver around in the message. 18:17 We will tend to think of our loved ones, people near and dear to us, and try to find a way for them to be justified. I was teaching this in a church one time, not this specific message, but on this subject. And I made the pastor's wife really mad because her thought was, "Well, what about my son? 18:37 Surely there's got to be a place for my son." Well, that's the kind of thing that we warn against doing. Let's try not to do that, to take the principles of God's Word and ask God to reveal to us how to apply those principles in the various relationships that we have. 18:54 So turn to First Corinthians chapter 7 because the question is asked, what about abandonment? This has been used for one of the justifications of divorce and remarriage: is the cause or the case of abandonment? 19:10 What if a husband or wife abandons their partner and leaves them and says, "I don't want to be married to you anymore"? Well, I heard one Christian pastor say that wherever you read about a justification for divorce, it also means remarriage. That's reading into the text of scripture. 19:31 That's a bad hermeneutic. So we got to nuke that. But if you look at chapter 7 of First Corinthians, verse 15, he talks about abandonment, whether a believing husband or wife is abandoned by their unbelieving spouse. 19:53 Verse 15, he says, "But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart. A brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace." What does that mean? 20:08 So they use that phrase "is not under bondage" to mean that they're no longer under the bondage of the universal marriage law of covenant marriage, that that has been negated because of the abandonment of the unbelieving spouse. But if you take that approach, 20:29 you have to disregard what Paul just said in verse 10. "Now to the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, a wife is not to depart from her husband, but even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. 20:49 And a husband is not to divorce his wife." And so in verse 39, "A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives. But if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes only in the Lord." Again, 21:08 you have to interpret the unclear through the clear. The unclear is the phrase "a brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases." But verse 10, 11, and 39 defines how you interpret that phrase. 21:25 That phrase simply means that in the context of abandonment, you are not under bondage to make a marriage work that the other person refuses to make work. 21:38 If they are bent on leaving, then you let them leave. And you are not under obligation to control them, to manipulate them, or to even demand from them that they fulfill their obligation. You are not under bondage in that way. 22:00 But the phrase "not under bondage" must be interpreted through verse 10, 11, and 39. There is no reason or cause justification for remarriage. So what about abandonment? On the notes, "The believing spouse is not under obligation to continue in trying to live with the unbeliever. 22:22 You cannot force something to work that the other party isn't wanting. At that point, you must simply say, 'What is my responsibility to this relationship?'" By the way, let me just say this. I know of a number of situations where a wife has been abandoned. 22:40 A dear sister in our own congregation a number of years ago had been abandoned by her husband years ago. And before her husband died, she's gone to be with the Lord. Before her husband died, they were reconciled. He repented. He was in a nursing home. And had he lived, I am convinced that they would have worked on getting back together again. 23:01 But he was dying. And she helped care for him in his dying days. Those stories are not just super saints. Those are actually people that live and breathe and serve God faithfully where they say, "Whatever it takes, however long it takes, I will wait. 23:24 I will wait." And sometimes it takes 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, 40 years. But the power of the testimony to see God restore those relationships is a glory to God. And you short-circuit that when you say, 23:44 "Like one man did to me, 'Well, I want to know if I get my wife back.'" Well, why do you want to get your wife back? It was an adulterous relationship. Why do you want to get your wife back? He said, "Well, I love her." I said, "But why do you want her back?" I said, "If you love her, you would be willing to wait for her forever." "Well, 24:05 I want to know if I get her back so I can get on with my life." That was the bottom line. I said, "What do you mean by getting on with your life?" "Well, then God must have somebody else for me." That was the agenda. That was the agenda. So the clear verses, 24:26 we've mentioned that, give no room for remarriage. So what about marriage's pre-conversion? So this is another way that people justify divorce and remarriage and say, "Well, this happened before they were believers, before they were Christians. 24:42 What do you do with that?" There are several questions that must be asked and answered. Does God recognize the one-flesh marriages or the universal marriage law? Does it apply to unbelievers? And yes, it does. 25:04 Cain, hardly a believer, hardly a citizen of heaven, had a wife. Potiphar had a wife. Abimelech had a wife. Sarah was not his wife. Herod had a wife. 25:24 Pilate had a wife. God recognizes the marriages of unbelievers. 25:34 In that case, the universal marriage law still applies. As evidenced by the phrase in, as we have it in Matthew 19 and all of the passages of scripture that relate to it, "Whosoever," verse 9 of Matthew 19:9, "I say to you, 25:52 whoever or whosoever divorces his wife," and so on. The whosoever is the same whosoever that is equally applicable to every son and daughter of Adam who wants to be saved. 26:08 "And whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." Who does that mean? It means whosoever. No distinction. Any living, breathing child of Adam in Adam's race is a whosoever. 26:27 "And whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." Again, same whosoever. Whosoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery. 26:39 So we have to say that God recognizes the marriages of unbelievers just like He does of those in the covenant relationships of the Christian faith. So then we get a little bit closer to a question. 26:55 What should be done if someone is in a divorced and remarried situation? What should be done? I want to be very cautious and careful here because these are very serious questions. They involve people's lives. 27:17 They involve families. They involve children. They involve relationships. They involve extended family relationships. What should be done if someone is in a divorced and remarried situation? Well, what is the nature of repentance? 27:40 That question must be answered. What does repentance look like? Proverbs 28:13, "But whosoever confesseth and forsaketh his sin shall have mercy." Matthew 3:8. John the Baptist said, 28:01 "Bring forth fruits of repentance." What is a fruit of repentance? What is a fruit of repentance? Well, then he goes on and say what it looked like for soldiers, what it looked like for tax collectors, what it looked like for common people, what it looked like for this group, that group. And it all involves turning, 28:22 turning away from sin. Repentance is a change of mind that leads to a change of life. It's not just a change of mind about sin. It is a change of direction in relation to sin. The Apostle Paul said in Acts 26:20 that they should repent, turn to God, 28:41 and do works befitting repentance. Now, when I was early in the ministry, we had a man who started attending our church. He was raised in the Mennonite church up in the valley. We call the valley of Lammat Valley. And he had moved down, married a woman, a young lady from southern Oregon where our church was. 29:03 He had attended our church years and years before I ever before I got there. And one day, we got the news that his wife and daughter—no, his daughter was not killed, but his wife was killed in a car accident. And so he started coming to our church. We reached out to him during that time. 29:23 He started coming to our church, bringing his girl, his little girl, to church. 29:27 And I remember having him over for supper one night and just approaching this subject about—I said, "How do you feel about remarriage, divorce and remarriage?" Because I wasn't sure what his position was. I said, "How do you feel about that?" Tried to approach it graciously and kindly and gently. And I said, 29:47 "You're going to be single now. And there's a lot of women out there that would love to have another husband." And so I explained to him our church position. And he said, "Yeah." He said, "That's what I believe. That's what I believe." And okay, we dodged the bullet on that one. 30:08 But what I didn't anticipate was that—yeah, I did anticipate it, but I tried to trust in his word—he ended up initiating and getting into a relationship with a divorced woman and went to her church and got married. 30:25 And I called the pastor of the other church. It was a conservative Baptist church. So they were not a loose living liberal group of people. But I said, "Pastor, what are you going to do about this? What do we do about this?" And these were his words. 30:46 He said, "I do not believe it was right for them to get married." "Ah, okay. God, we're on the same page there." But he said, "Now that they are married, it's my responsibility to make that marriage work." I said, "But what about repentance? What does repentance look like?" "Well, 31:07 that's where we differ. What does repentance look like?" "What would repentance look like if I broke into your house and stole your stuff? What would repentance look like?" "Well, you got to, number one, confess it was sin. 31:25 And secondly, give the stuff back." "What would repentance look like with a homosexual marriage?" "Well, we would say repent, confess the sin, and return, 31:40 turn your back on that sin." "What would it look like if any kind of sin—if I stole your car and I'm not a Christian, 31:54 but I become a Christian and God does a work in my heart and I confess my sins and I say, 'It was wrong for me to steal that car, but I'm going to keep the car.'" "No, you're not. That's not repentance. 32:13 That's not fruits for repentance." And like I said, I want to be kind. I want to be gentle. I want to be understanding. But we have to understand what repentance is. Repentance is to forsake the sin and to the best of our ability to do restitution. 32:35 Same with fornication. You have a young man and young woman sleeping with each other and committing fornication, not married. What do you say? "Well, we'll confess it. Confess that we sin. But we're going to keep doing it." Sin, confess. Sin, confess. That's not repentance. That's not repentance. 32:54 Repentance is turn from the sin and do the first works. So what should be done if someone is in a divorced and remarried situation? What is the nature of repentance? What is adultery? We must also ask the question, 33:14 is adultery a state or an act? Is adultery an act of getting married or of committing adultery, having sex with someone who's not your wife while you are married? Is that adultery? Or is adultery a state, a condition that you live in? 33:37 Well, we can find that out by asking the question, what is marriage? Is marriage the act of getting married? Or is it the state of living in marriage? I believe it's both. I believe it's both. It is the act of getting married, 33:57 and that is entering into marriage. But then it is the state of living in marriage, the state of living as husband and wife in a one-flesh relationship. So if that's marriage, then the perversion of marriage also involves both of those aspects. 34:14 It is the act of getting remarried as well as the state of living in a remarried situation. You can't have it both ways. So this is crucial for us to understand what repentance looks like. 34:30 That repentance looks like turning away from the state that I am in as a result of the act of getting married. Having looked at this from a number of different angles, I really believe that the only way out, 34:51 the only way forward for a person who's truly repented is to live separate. 35:01 Or if that is not possible, to live celibate. Now, that becomes very difficult if you're living in the same house. But if there is a way for the man and woman to be separate living quarters, then that's the only way out. 35:22 That's the only way out that I see in scripture when you understand what repentance is. 35:31 What about children? 35:34 Well, I believe that those who have birthed children, brought children into this situation, have a responsibility to those children. They do. In Ezra chapter 10 that we just read, Brother Duane just read, there's responsibility while they put away the wives and the children. 35:54 I don't believe God would have been pleased for them to forsake their responsibility because scripture says that we are to take care of our children. We're to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. We are to protect them. We're to provide them. 36:12 Ezra 10 gives us a window into what God thinks about non-covenant relationships. Now, you say, "Well, that has to do with about a pagan, marrying a pagan and being unequally yoked." Well, it did in that setting. 36:28 But the larger picture there is that they were marrying outside of the covenant of faith. It was illegitimate marriage. It was disobedience to what God had told them. God had told them, "Do not do that." And so the disobedience was in doing it. And it was widespread, rampant, and needed to be dealt with. 36:50 And Nehemiah dealt with it again several years later. He said in that passage, "It didn't work for Solomon. And it's not going to work for us either." So that tells us a little bit what God thinks about the severity of this action. What about financial responsibilities? 37:11 Well, 1 Timothy 5:8 says we are to provide for our own household. We're to provide for those children that we have brought into the world in illegitimate marriages. We're to provide for them. "If anyone provide not for his own household, he is denied the faith and is worse than an infidel." So there's a need there. 37:32 And let me say this. 37:33 My dad was always very strong on this, that if we believe that separation is the only way forward or celibacy, then we as a church need to do whatever we can to assist that to happen 37:52 because it is expensive to 37:56 keep two households going, much less one house, much less two. And how can the church enter into giving and lending assistance as the brotherhood of believers to help make that happen to a person, a couple that is genuinely wanting to follow God, to follow Christ? 38:17 Now, 38:18 I'm going to tackle this one. Turn to 1 Corinthians chapter 5. Now, if there's ever anything where I think I'm putting myself out there to be shot, this will be it. 38:37 And I want to be very kind again and gracious because I know that there are families represented in this church that struggle with these issues. How do you relate to those living in sin? 38:54 And probably a lot of the other things that I've said so far are kind of 39:00 out there. They don't affect us maybe that much. But this one probably affects most of us. How do you relate to those living in sin? What about attending a wedding? Well, we may tell them that we don't agree with them getting married, but then we attend the wedding. 39:22 And we bless that event with the blessing of presence, not presence of giving them something, but presence of being there. 39:33 To attend a wedding, brothers and sisters, in my opinion—and this is taking what we know from the scripture and applying it to life situations—in my opinion, to attend a wedding of a divorced and remarried person is to, 39:53 by presence, affirm that event. And you say, "Well, they know that I don't agree with it. But you're going. 40:03 How do you legitimately go and not have others at least looking on saying, 'Well, they must be okay with this in some way'?" I would challenge you with this question. Would you attend a homosexual wedding of a brother, 40:25 sister, friend, parent, child? Would you do that? And most of us would categorically say, "No. It's not right. It's against God. It's against nature. It's not right." But then we would turn around and go to a remarriage wedding. 40:47 And to me, somehow that is inconsistent as it is to the world. I remember reading Tony Campolo. Tony Campolo has taken a very liberal view of marriage and divorce and remarriage. And about 25, 30 years ago, I read his statement. This was before homosexual marriage was a thing, was legal. 41:08 He said, "You as a Christian community that condemn homosexuality are so inconsistent because you will justify divorce and remarriage and condemn homosexual marriage. If one is wrong, they're both wrong." I found that, at least being honest—I didn't agree with his position, 41:28 but he was at least being honest as he rubbed shoulders with those in those situations—we must be consistent. What about allowing them to stay in your home? 41:41 Would you allow practicing homosexuals, lesbians in your home 41:51 to stay in your home in the same room under your roof? What about eating and socializing? 1 Corinthians 5. Thankfully, we're out of time. We won't be able to spend much time on this. But far be it from us to say, "This is a hard scripture. 42:10 We're not going to deal with it." That's not being fair to the scriptures. I looked at a number of commentaries. They won't touch this verse with a 10-foot pole. 1 Corinthians chapter 5, the context of expelling the immoral member, excommunication. "I wrote to you," verse 9 in my epistle, 42:31 "not to keep company with sexually immoral people or fornicators," sexually immoral people, porneia. We've dealt with that word, "of this world." Yet, I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world or with the covetous, extortioners, or idolaters. 42:51 By the way, interesting, it's not just sexual sins he's concerned about. It's covetousness, extortion, dishonesty, idolatry. Those are some other things we ought to be concerned about too. Amen. 43:09 "But now I have written to you not to keep company or associate with." The Greek word means to mix in with. 43:20 To not mix in with anyone named a brother who is sexually immoral or covetous or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner. That's a list. Not even to eat with such a person. 43:40 Now, what do we do with that? Here's some possibilities. Let me say this. This does not mean you don't eat with somebody who left your church for another Bible-believing church. 44:00 And so not wanting to pick out any one particular group, but you leave some churches and they will shun you. It's not for leaving a church. It is for living immorally, an immoral lifestyle. 44:20 One way of looking at this is that this is in the local fellowship with those who have been excommunicated. It's in the context of excommunication, verse 1 all the way through verse 13. "But those who are outside, God judges. 44:39 Therefore, put away from yourselves the evil person." He's talking about that in the context of the local church. Also, to not eat together can also refer to the love feast and the Lord's Supper, which was a part of their love feast. We read about that in 1 Corinthians 11. 45:01 It can also mean anybody who calls themselves a believer. Some translations translate this, "If anyone calls themselves a believer." Some translations translate this saying, "If anyone is called a believer." So there may be some wiggle room there. 45:21 Is the person calling himself a believer or is he actually claiming to be a believer or has been called a believer by somebody else? Not real sure how to interpret all of that. 45:37 The word associate means keep company with, to mix up together with those called brothers or sisters or who call themselves brothers. We know this has been carried to extremes. 45:50 But at least, at the very least, this applies to communion and the Lord's Supper in the context of the local church and those who live in sin and have been and/or have been excommunicated. That's the very least that it means. 46:11 It may mean not associate with them at all on a friendship level and certainly not a regular association. We have had excommunications here that have been very difficult and painful. And what do you do with those relationships? 46:32 You want to reach out. You've been friends. And according to this, you're not to associate with that anymore. 46:42 Also, I have been in settings where communion has been served. And I don't know the congregation where I would be participating. 46:57 And my wife has kind of made a decision that we will not commune in settings where we don't know the people and don't know what is in that congregation and where there may be divorce and remarriage and likely is divorce and remarriage. 47:18 The minimum I will end with this. The minimum is that they should not be part of a communion and love feast. And there should not be regular association with someone living in sin who has been dealt with by a local congregation or who has not been dealt with. The potential is there. 47:40 And you have to work through this in your own heart. What do you do with family dinners, family reunions, family holidays? 47:55 Mind the Lord. I don't know what else to say but that. I want you to turn very quickly to Matthew, no, Mark chapter 9. 48:06 You say, "Brother Todd, this is some hard groceries you've been giving us this morning." Mark 9 and 10. Mark 10, Jesus deals with divorce and remarriage. That's where we started on this study. 48:23 Mark 9 is the context around that passage. 48:30 And I want you to apply this to divorce and remarriage, lest you think, "Well, what about this? What about that? What about marrying somebody who was divorced with that married somebody divorced? It was their first marriage. And then they want to get married now. And what did Jesus say?" But whoever causes one of these—no, okay. 48:52 Look at verse 43. "If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter into life maimed than rather than having two hands to go to hell into the fire that it shall never be quenched where their worm does not die and the fire is not quenched. 49:13 And if your foot causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life lame rather than having two feet to be cast into hell into the fire that shall never be quenched where their worm does not die and the fire is not quenched. And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. 49:33 It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell where their worm does not die and the fire is not quenched." What's he saying? Do whatever it takes. 49:49 Separate from whatever it takes 49:55 that would keep you out of heaven and do whatever it takes to get to heaven. That includes chapter 10, marriage, divorce, and remarriage. So what are you willing to give up for the sake of the kingdom of God? What is the worth of one's soul? 50:17 Jesus said that there are some who are eunuchs by birth. There are some who are eunuchs by choice. There are some who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of God. That's a drastic measure. I'm not suggesting it. 50:34 But it is an option to do whatever it takes to get to heaven and not to be disqualified. So if there's any question, don't do it. Let's pray.